Many of us started the new year with overwhelming positivity and every intention of introducing new life habits like, working out more and becoming more productive. You know, those new year goals. However, many of us struggle to see our goals through for the year. In my own experience, it boils down to two reasons – which I’ll explain in detail – one, falling into a backseat mindset and two, having a limited view on life. There are five actions that have helped me get back on track to achieving my new year goals and I’ll share them with you here!
A backseat mindset will eventually lead to a crash – facts!
First, what’s a backseat mindset? It’s when you are no longer participating in the direction of your life in a way that is active. When I’ve gone into a backseat mind mode, I become complacent and the goals I had set out to accomplish are no longer at the forefront of my mind. Let me say, if you’ve found yourself off track well before Jan 31st, just know you are not alone, but also know that it’s never too late to get back on yo shit!
Now, to get back on track we have to become aware of things causing us to get derailed. Awareness is key! The reality of it all is that each of us will be challenged by different things that can throw us off, such as relationship drama, a family member passing on, some day job bull-shit and just being overwhelmed by all of our responsibilities as creative women in general. Pin point what those things are for you. I have noticed, that I can be easily distracted. I have moments when I lose faith in my ability to make things happen or some real life shit happens and it takes my mind off what my goals are. Yeah, there will be those days or circumstances that take you off track, but you do not have to stay in ‘Defeatedville’ beating yourself up. Success is measured by how fast you bounce back. So dust off and keep it moving. The world does not stop spinning.
Own your power and you can travel a long way
Once you’ve become aware of the very things that can take you off your game, you have to face them and work out ways to lessen their power to offset your plans. This will require a bit of introspection, which involves asking the hard question: Why? Why does this bother me? Why do I react in such a way? Each time that you are faced with something that sets you off emotionally, mentally or physically, acknowledge it and address the cause of your distraction. Ask yourself why, to understand and adjust your mindset. Then get back to handling your business. Do not stay in a backseat mind wallowing in stress or depression. How? Just choose not to. Just Dekit! It will get easier each time you do this. Be patient and compassionate towards yourself in this process. Sooner or later you’ll find yourself less bothered with a shorter detour and a faster bounce back. The goal isn’t to give up on our goals, right? So push through and keep at it. NO MATTER WHAT!
Now it will be difficult to change up your lifestyle because your behaviors and habits make up who you are. However, becoming aware of how you are affected by situations, along with your reactions is powerful. For example, if you know that you stress eat at your job, bringing your favorite healthy snacks to work, will make it easier for you to reach your weight loss goal. Doing these sort of things allows you to play offensively, meaning you will be proactive instead of reactive. Something that has been helping me, which I’ve learned through my meditating practice, is deep breathing. I do this when I feel stress or overwhelmed. It allows me to take a brief pause to collect myself and get back to work. Know that when you take the wheel, not only do you steer your life where you want to go, but you own your power and the pace at which you can go. At every turn, you move on your own terms and will reap the benefits of accomplishing your goals.
A backseat mind can drive itself into a wall it never saw
Being behind the wheel of your life is always best no matter the outcome. Why is this? This is because life is about experiences and experience, so do not limit yourself. The more experiences you have, the more insight and wisdom you’ll have at your disposal to know better. To avoid a backseat mind set, you want to have the knowledge or experience to be able to pivot when needed, making you limitless. This is why the person who never started is worse off than the person who has tried and failed. Live it to tell it, and keep living.
Here are the 5 actions that helped me get back on track.
They may or may not help you. Each of the 5 actions mentioned has made a huge positive impact on my mindset and my productivity. I hope it helps you as well.
1. Start with your meals.
This was a wake up call for me. I thought because I am plant-based and I eat my greens that I was good. Nah. I was also eating a ton of junk, not enough whole foods and therefore lacking in vitamins and minerals. Believe it or not, if you are lacking in any vitamins or minerals it can affect your mood, motivation and can cause depression. So eating whole foods and supplementing if needed is very powerful. How do I know? I did it…I lived it, to tell it. Particularly it was vitamin D, B12 and sea vegetables that really helped me. Listen to your body, it will tell you what works and what you need (or see your doctor).
2. Read or listen to motivating books/music to support a productive mind shift.
You also have to be particular about what your mind consumes. Talk positively to yourself and make yourself a priority. I am talking about high vibrating music. You know if it’s high vibrating from how it makes you feel. Do you feel like you can take on the day or do you feel like you want to rob a hoe? lol Seriously, we all know that music can set the tone for our day or a party, etc. Look out for a JustDekit Spotify playlist.
3. Create very small micro goals from the larger goal.
This means take smaller bites of the pie and before you know it, it’s all gone. Maybe pie isn’t a great example since I mentioned the significance of food. So yeah, um…replace pie with a delicious salad. Breaking down the task to something smaller not only makes it more manageable, but it becomes less intimidating as well. For instance, one of my goals is to get in shape for 2019, so I did like many people and I got a gym membership. Now, I know people that go to the gym for 1 hour or even 2 hours at a time. Knowing who I am and that I hate going to gym because I find it to be boring (among other things), I decided that I would only go for 30 minutes a day. Every time I make it to the gym I mark an X on my calendar. With that said, I also want to mention that your overall goal has to be somewhere visible and easily reviewed; which is why many people start the year by creating a vision board. However, putting reminders in your phone or post-it notes on your mirror or a screen saver on your computer are other ways to keep goals on the forefront of your mind. Sometimes it takes just seeing it everywhere like advertisements. So yeah, spam yourself.
4. Set yourself up to win by removing or limiting the distractions and adding more avenues of support for yourself.
For me, it required that I set boundaries and limits with people in my life. When you make yourself a priority and take care of you first, your time becomes more important and therefore the time spent with others is of more quality. This means it’s scheduled time and you need to be selective with whom you spend your time. To add to this, meditating really helps to calm your mind and allow you to become less distracted and focused. It also allows you to have that internal time for self, you are your best friend any day. It also helps with becoming comfortable with being still while surrounded by noise, which starts out with your thoughts. It’s definitely something to try if you haven’t yet. Start with 5 minutes a day and work your way up.
Being comfortable with yourself and in your own head-space is great, but another thing that can help is having an accountability friend. This person is either seeking to accomplish the same goals or some one you know you that you absolutely cannot bull-shit.
5. Lastly, you must keep a calendar or journal of sorts.
Yes, track your progress. Tracking the progress of a project and your mindset helps you win. Now, different things work for different people. For instances, putting X’s on a calendar or next to a completed task works for some. Writing in a journal nightly or once a week can be beneficial for your mindset. A gratitude journal is like the best kind of journal that you can add to your nightly routine. Or you can record your thoughts on your phone and post it to Instagram or Facebook, whatever works. Some of theses methods like Instagram and Facebook might keep you more accountable and on your game, but the goal is to be self sufficient. The motivation and drive should come from within. What is working right now for me are X’s and some quick journal time. Also, do not think you have to write a novel every day. Right now, I am writing 1 to 2 sentences. But again, do what works for you.
Everything I’ve mentioned here isn’t anything new or magical. Sometimes we over complicate things or the answer is right in front of us. All of the 5 actions can be done by anyone, maybe not all once but that’s okay.
I am a woman just working towards my best life. Basically, when I fall off, I make every attempt to get back up. I don’t claim to be an expert and I am not wildly successful yet, but I am relentless. And you should be too. This life is amazing no matter how you look at it. Everyday, people are turning tragedies into triumphs. Why can’t we do the same? We can! Just Dekit!
The very best to you and yours this new year! Let’s fuck it up, y’all! Make it happen and as usual Just Dekit!
PS: Thanks so much for reading. I hope it helps! Let me know in the comments if it does. Or, if you have a bounce back story or technique let me know in the comments as well.